June 9, 2011, 10:00 PM at Majestic (KBS) Bangalore - platform #23. I was stressed out because of work, very tired, impatiently waiting for the bus to take me home. An incident took place that lasted for less than ten minutes.
I saw an old woman - probably between 75-80 years of age, grey hair, wearing thick specs, old cotton saree - stretched out her arm in front of a young man. She was given one or two rupee coin. She thanked him and started approaching me. I generally don't entertain beggars of any kind, because I have the feeling that the money I give them is not being used constructively; most of them end up in spending money on bad habits like smoking, drinking, etc and most of all these people are ill mannered.
As she came limping towards me, I observed her features; she was very fragile. By her looks I could make out that she was not a beggar herself (I don't know how I deduced that). She stretched out her arm. I saw extreme emotional pain in her face so vividly that tears filled my eyes almost instantly. I am typically a man who doesn't lose control over my emotions in situations of this kind. I really don't know why I was so much occupied by her appearance. Thoughts like "She might have been dismissed by her family. She does not have anything to feed herself" flashed my mind. I observed that her thumb was twisted. I opened my wallet, and placed a 10 rupee note in her palm. She waved her hand with gesture that said “Thank you & God bless you" and she left. I couldn't stop thinking about her. I looked around. I was almost on the verge of crying. "How could Rs. 10 help?! Its nothing! How is that old woman leading her life? Why is the world so cruel? Why is God troubling such people in a bitter way? Why is life so unfair? Why, Why, Why?" - all these questions struck my mind like thunder bolts. At this time, my fatigue was gone. I was very much disturbed and extremely moved by her condition. "Do something to help her! Do something! What do I do? OK. I will give her another 100 rupees!" She was moving away toward another platform. I ran behind her, caught hold of her, held her hand and I placed money in her palm. When I returned, unanswerable questions struck me: "Will that money really help her? Will it be sufficient? I mean, does it serve her food to satisfy her hunger for days? If yes, for how long? May be for maximum of two days. And what will happen to her after that? How does she spend rest of the days left in her life?" I got lost in these stabbing thoughts for some time.
The bus I was waiting for finally arrived. It took sometime to pull myself all together. I still had some kind of guilt feeling that I did not help her much. Extreme thoughts like - "I should take care of her. I must do something for her betterment. Life is really cruel. We die for eating junk food and buying trendy clothes, but just look at her. She is not having another pair of clothes to wear or money to feed herself. Is God here to help her?" - passed through my mind even after the bus started its journey couple of minutes later. All these feelings came directly from my heart. I could feel the difference! I pity her.
Honestly, I really don't know what turned me so much. I wrote this post as fast as I could not to miss out anything that had happened and to read it again and again just to remind myself "Be happy with whatever you have" and "keep helping people as much as possible".
* * *
Next morning, I was getting ready for work. I stood in front of the mirror. I asked myself "Was that really you last night? I don't think so... with those tears in your eyes... I can hardly believe it! I mean, I don't know." I discussed with my sister-in-law. She said "It's a good thing what you did by helping her! I have done it myself couple of times. I completely understand your situation. But, some people don't agree and think that we are crazy. It's really hard to watch people in such conditions. Now, let it go.”
good one le.. u did a good thing for sure.. :)
ReplyDeleteReally a heart Touching post...N i agree wid whatever u did...Its difficult 2 differentiate the genuine ones...Bt if we can we shud help them as much as we can...Gud job must say...
ReplyDeleteGood one and its difficult to answer questions that come across when we see such people. :( You did a good deed :)
ReplyDeletedude was really heart touching. these r common but few people like u will think deeply about them. nice dude but what we can do only we can donate our contribution to old age homes so we can be help full to the consernd...........
ReplyDeleteravi
No issues in helping beggers/poor but question remains how many times you end up doing the same because every corner you find them... i am just kidding dont demotivate yourself, you tried best to keep her happpy atleast for couple of days :)
ReplyDeleteFirst of, I really love this piece of your writings. Simply heart-moving. Second, you are such a fine person with a fine heart! I am sure what you did meant a lot to that old lady. And lastly, I love how close your relationship with your sis-in-law. --Love it!
ReplyDelete(your new follower!)
I believe there are some things that pull on our emotions more than others. Perhaps seeing a genuine beggar, someone truly in need was one of those things that moved you deeply. Know that somehow you reached out to bless her in the only way that you could at that time...know that your good deed will come back to you in many ways.
ReplyDeleteCheers, Jenn
Very interesting when we meet someone -a stranger - and suddenly we are asking deep questions and pondering the meaning of life. You did a wonderful thing but more importantly you saw her as a fellow human being. Regardless of the fact.she was a beggar you felt she mattered. Everyone matters. Great post. Thanks for the comment on my blog and leading me here. :)
ReplyDelete